Dating – Page 3 – Love in India

Top 15 Unique Valentine’s Day Ideas

I’m giving Saucy Saturday a miss this Saturday because you seem to be more in need of romance than sauce this season.

Some time back I’d written about some unique and creative anniversary ideas. While some of them are quite specific to anniversary celebrations, many of them can be used in any special occasion for a couple. Here are some unique Valentine’s Day ideas for celebrating this special day with your special someone.

Teach her the “Love Alphabet” through a letter. For each letter of the alphabet, pin down an item which is associated to the two of you and your relationship/marriage. For example, A for Azure – the restaurant we visit most frequently, B for Boston – where we first met, C for Calvin – our dog, etc.
With a little bit of effort you can convert your Alphabet of Love into a photo book – with a different page for each letter and an image representing the associated object.
Get more creative. Convert each photo+item page into a flashcard. Put them in a nice box, decorate with roses and your favourite Valentine’s Day card.
Valentine’s Day is about flowers and Valentine’s Day is about chocolates. How about combining the two in the form of a carefully crafted chocolate bouquet, like this one?
Photo by josanne70

… If you’re running short on time, try a simpler one instead:

Photo by litree

Redo your first date. Visit the same places, eat the same stuff and do the same things. Ours involved a dinner and hopping from sea face to sea face all around the city till 3 in the morning! Isn’t it superbly exciting to relive those crazy moments?
You get custom couple key chains which you can order in pairs. Go nuts with the design – you can choose everything from your names to your thumb impressions as the key chain dangler.
Make a scrapbook/photobook/love letter out of all of those tiny romantic thoughts you had about each other at the crush stage, but couldn’t tell each other. Like, “I suddenly started tweeting Lady Gaga lyrics all over just to get your attention, ’cause I knew you liked it.”
Do you know paper napkins can be folded into cute little envelopes? Make some of these, glue them onto a large piece of art paper, and put the notes you made in the previous steps into these. He/she will just love the cute crafty bit of romance.

Photo by glitterandgrunge.com

Put your notes in the little envelopes but don’t stick them on to a piece of paper. Create a “Goody basket” with chocolates, framed photos, flowers and those little envelopes with your love inside them. If you have any special gift for her you can hide it in here too.
Write “I love you” in different languages and fonts and present to her in the form of a love letter. You can also choose from steps #7 – #9 & repeat with these “I love you” messages.
Write a “50 unique things about you which make me fall in love everyday” letter to her. You can also choose from steps #7 – #9 & repeat with these “unique things about you” messages/notes.
Do you know “cafuné” in Brazilian Portuguese means “The act of tenderly running your fingers through someone’s hair”? There are many such awesomely romantic words and phrases in other languages which have no English equivalent. Use these creatively in a love letter describing your special feelings for her, or use these as messages/notes in #7 – #9.
Give her a calendar/photo book with her name written in custom themes in all pages.
I discovered a great website for creating your custom love poem. You can customize it with her name and favourite gifts and then download it in the shape of a heart like I did. All of this for free!

If you liked these you can check out the complete list of 50 Original & Unique Anniversary Ideas for Sweeping Your Spouse Completely Off Their Feet, most of which, while meant for wedding anniversary surprises, can be perfect for Valentine’s Day celebrations too.

“Valentine’s Day is The Day of Being Fooled, Cheated & Robbed,” My Interview With Love in India Fan

Valentine’s Day is in the air. But the chocolaty aroma is not free of the acidic fumes of over-commercialization and over-westernization – according to some. What does the Indian youth really think of Valentine’s Day? To find out, I got chatting with a few young fans of Love in India. Today is the first in this interview series, My Valentine’s Day.

Rahul (that’s not his real name folks) is a fine young man, in the process of earning his MBA somewhere in Mumbai, after dutifully completing his graduation in Chemical Engineering, in 2011. He’s a gourmet, movie-buff, Facebook-ist (I invented that word when I came to know Rahul) and travel-junkie. “Spending all my life amidst the din and bustle of Mumbai makes me irresistibly attracted to the tranquillity of places like Haridwar, Hrishikesh etc.”, he says, “You should try it.”

So Rahul, what are your thoughts on Valentine’s Day?

Photo by Andovercookiemama

To me, it’s a great opportunity to get fooled, cheated and robbed.

Many hearts are broken, many suicides occur around this time. And of course – getting a lot of your money nicked by clever corporations is also a part of the whole game. Prices of gift items double around this time. So it’s basically an occasion for well-meaning boys trying to impress their girls, to cough up a lot of money, saved over weeks, or even months. Nowadays you’ve got restaurants, resorts and spas luring you with special offers (some call them “discounts”, I wonder why) around Valentine’s Day. All for the gullible trying to win over the loyalty of their partners by spending money.

The market has managed to name a price on everything – pleasure, companionship, togetherness.

Maybe even love.

Oh … well… quite a strong position there…What would you say about Valentine’s Day having so-called ‘evil influences’ on today’s Indian youth – as claimed (and unfortunately acted upon) by some political parties?

14th Feb. is the second most popular day of the year for rapes, sexual crimes, and substance abuse – after Dec. 31.

If I remember correctly, statistics say that after 31^st Dec., 14^th Feb. is the date on which maximum rapes & related sexual crimes take place. Many an unwanted pregnancy, many a violent crime are recorded around Valentine’s Day all around the world. Even sales of drugs & alcohol peak in this period.

You’ve got this designated day when couples want to look good/hot/cool. I remember from my school days, girls wearing short skirts displaying their waxed legs as 14^th Feb. grew close…That week used to be full of eve-teasing and fighting among the boys. Sometimes these tiffs – started off around Valentine’s Day – would linger on for a long time, even years. And I’m not joking. Teenagers, as you know, are the most enthusiastic about Valentine’s Day. Sometimes they tend to get a bit too carried away by the adrenalin. So you go to pubs, get drunk, dance and willingly or unwillingly get exploited. Young people often don’t fully realize the implications of their actions. That’s the problem. If they can be educated to celebrate this day while also taking full responsibility for themselves, then may be that’s a solution. Otherwise, the negative implications which have been highlighted can’t be wished away at all.

That’s interesting, coming from a youngster like you. I’m curious to know your own experience of Valentine’s Day… What was your experience of it as a child?

In my convent Valentine’s Day was “That day when the Christian girls wear very short skirts, roam around with their boyfriends and get naughty.”

I have studied in a convent. So I was aware of the existence of something called Valentine’s Day from as early as the beginning of secondary school, even though it wasn’t so widespread in India at the time.

I was your classic nerd – in love with nothing but my studies. In my school Valentine’s Day celebrations were limited mainly to Christian boys and girls. So the way I saw it was, “That day when the Christian girls wear very short skirts, roam around with their boyfriends and get naughty.” I was in 8th standard or so by the time it started to gain widespread popularity as a day for general celebration of romantic love. But then by that time I had also realized that girls would hardly be interested in me. Walking up to the canteen with a boy who walks with a limp in his left leg was not something you would want to be seen doing.

So you’ve never actually celebrated Valentine’s Day?

Oh yes I have! I had a girlfriend, you see. I did celebrate Valentine’s Day in my 2^nd, 3^rd, 4^th year of engineering.

Ah…college romance. What was your first Valentine’s Day like?

It was in 2nd year of engineering 14 Feb 2009. My then girlfriend (or so I thought) had just said “yes” to me after we went out for two movies (I still remember – these were Ghajini & Rab ne Bana di Jodi) on two consecutive days after the start of the 4th semester of engineering.

I was on top of the world, because now I was the most hated guy in my batch. Yes you’ve guessed it right – she was one of the hottest girls of my class. Obviously no one felt I was up to her standards because I was disabled. So I wanted to make extra efforts & prove it to her & the whole college that I’m the coolest dude around and that I deserved her.

I have wandered tirelessly around the gullies of Durgapur, day after day, looking for her special Valentine’s Day gift.

So, coming back to the V-Day story – I got an expensive soft toy, a T shirt, chocolates & a dress for her. All giftwrapped. She came to college at 8 in the morning. We had breakfast & tea. We bunked college (of course!) went for a movie at the most famous multiplex of Durgapur (did I tell you I went to college in Durgapur?), followed by lunch at a good restaurant. Time slipped away as we talked about nothing till we were hungry again. Then we went to Café Coffee Day…then just when she was about to leave, I gave her all the gifts.

But I haven’t yet told you about the most special gift yet, which I gave her right at the end. I had wandered tirelessly for a week around the gullies of Durgapur, searching for it.

It was a nose ring.

It was the cheapest of all the gifts, but it was my deep desire to see her wear it, as I felt it will make her look really sexy. I had been visualizing her, fantasizing her wearing a nose ring of my choice.

That was special you know – a gift of my choice.

Frankly that was the only real Valentine’s Day gift from me to her. Other expensive gifts I gave her were meant only for making her feel good and a cut above all the other girls of my college. It was also to give her something to brag about, that would make up for my disability.

Have you ever tried a funny Valentine’s Day surprise?

She loved water.

Somehow the health benefits of drinking a lot of water had gotten to her head. She could drink water at any time and wouldn’t stop talking about how important it is for our body.

On our 2nd Valentine’s day, in addition to a “real” gift, I got her something special. A carefully & artistically packed gift – packed in multiple layers of wrapping paper which took her more than 3-4 minutes to open.

After opening it she found a bottle of mineral water from Bisleri.

After this whenever she’d get upset I’d get her a nicely packed Bisleri. I even got it for her birthday (apart from a regular gift, of course. ;) )

Have you ever received a Valentine’s Day gift? What was it like?

Yes yes I did receive my share of chocolates, t-shirts and college bags. ;)

But the best gift of all was when I asked her to dress up like a bride & get a photograph clicked & she got me a snap of her. I had kept it with me for a long…long time.

I could have kept it with me forever, but I didn’t.

It hurts.

Valentine’s Day Card Workshop 2 – You Are Stuck in My Heart

So after Valentine’s Day Card Workshop 1 – You Make My Heart Alive, today is your second class in our V-Day cards series.
Today’s card is inspired by one of my favourite songs – You Are Stuck in My Heart by C21. Here’s what it looks like:

Do you want a special original card like that for your special someone this 14th Feb? If yes, read on.

Things you’ll need:

1. Medium sized post-its/heart-shaped post-its if available.

2. Scissors.

3. A pencil.

4. Ruler

5. Coloured pens (Optional, for decoration)

Valentine’s Day card 2 step 1

You need to create 2 heart shapes such that one fits inside the other. You can either start from 2 heart shaped post-its…

…or broad post-its from which you can create the heart shapes on your own.

Valentine’s Day card 2 step 2

Fold the post-it in half so that the two edges coincide perfectly. Press well.

Valentine’s Day card 2 step 3

Carefully draw a half-heart on any one side of this folded piece of paper.

Cut along the drawn lines to create a perfect, symmetrical heart shape.

Now the important part.

Valentines Day Card 2 step 4

Fold the heart in half and make two marks on its spine at a specific distance from each other. I’ve chosen 3.5 cm here.

Valentines Day Card 2 step 5

Fold the heart and cut out a very thin slit on its spine.

Valentines Day Card 2 step 6

Choose another heart-shaped post-it (or make it following the first few steps).

Valentines Day Card 2 step 7

Measure out the same distance (3.5 cm) from the top of the spine of the second heart.

Valentines Day Card 2 step 8

Your objective is to cut out a smaller heart from this second heart, with spine measuring exactly the same as what you measured out on the spine of the first heart (so that the two fit together perfectly).

Valentines Day Card 2 step 9

Now the tricky part. Slide the smaller heart through the slit on the spine of the bigger one. Be careful not to tear any of them!

Valentines Day Card 2 step 10

Here, you have your “You are Stuck in My Heart”. Now try around variations like actually attaching the sticky sides of the post-its, to give a more “stuck” effect :) …

…Or pour out your heart with messages…

You know your special someone will never forget it. :)

Valentine’s Day Card Workshop 1 – You Make My Heart Alive

Valentine’s Day is just about a week away and I know you’re looking for some truly novel, truly great ideas to wow your special someone this 14th Feb.

Roses and chocolate are ok, but I’m sure you’d want to give your special someone something more this 14th Feb – something that will truly touch their heart. When it comes to gifting, no amount of money can replace the time, effort and thoughts you put into it. To help you create the most romantic surprise for him/her this Valentine’s Day, I’m starting today with a series of workshops for making entirely original and creative Valentines Day Cards.

The best thing about these is they all take less than 10 minutes to make, and you don’t need to be a pro (if you know anything about me, you know that I’m not a pro). What’s more – they can be made from absolutely everyday stationary and I promise that the tools needed will never go beyond a pair of scissors, glue and maybe an occasional ruler (I don’t have any other tools than these myself).

So let’s get started with the first.

Today’s card is called “You make my heart alive”, and here’s what it looks like:

Things you’ll need:

1. White paper, a bit hard – you can get blank card material paper at any stationery shop.

2. Post-its. The 2.5 cm by 7.5 cm strips variety.

3. Scissors.

4. Glue

5. A pencil.

6. Coloured pens (Optional, for decoration)

Valentine’s Day card 1 step 1: Choose your favourite set of coloured post-its.

Valentine’s Day card 1 step 2: Take one post-it of each colour and hold them aligned.

Valentine’s Day card 1 step 3: Fold them twice on to each other to make two equidistant creases.

Valentine’s Day card 1 step 4: Fold the folds on to each other so that each little square(ish) plane of paper coincides.

Valentine’s Day card 1 step 5: Cut them up carefully to have 9 equal-sized square pieces of coloured paper.

Valentine’s Day card 1 step 6: You’ll eventually cut these 9 squares into 9 heart-shapes of different colours. Draw a symmetrical heart-shape carefully with a pencil on one of them.

Valentine’s Day card 1 step 7: Align all the pieces, with the one with the heart on top.

Valentine’s Day card 1 step 8: Fold the entire set in half, from the middle.

Valentine’s Day card 1 step 9: Cut them up carefully in the shape of the heart you drew. You need to be careful to cut 9X2=18 layers of hard post-it into symmetrical pieces.

Valentine’s Day card 1 step 10: Here. You have 9 (almost) identical colourful hearts.Now stick them on in a random fashion to a piece of white art paper to create the perfect romantic hand-made card for your Valentine this 14th Feb. :)

Here’s just an example. Don’t forget to go crazy with the message!

Want more card options? Try Valentine’s Day Card 2 – You Are Stuck in My Heart.

Mathematical Love Letter

Happy New Year everyone. I’m sure you enjoyed your New Year Eve’s parties.

In case you’re experiencing first-day-at-work-after-holidays blues, here’s a piquant mix of romance and laughter to fix you up.

Love in India reader and enthusiast Benny recently suggested that I create a romantic proposal using mathematical analogies. I loved the idea instantly. Here’s my attempt in response to Benny’s query.

My Dear Love,

The moment your eyes and mine fell in the same straight line, the tangent from your eyes became a perpendicular bisector of my heart.

Fully in line with Newton’s law of gravitational force, the force of attraction you’ve ever since applied on my heart is proportional to the product of your beauty and your intelligence. Surprisingly, the proportionality is not determined by a constant K (as told my Newton), but by a chaotic function f, the nature of which I’m yet to determine. I suspect it’s “you”.

Also unlike gravity, the force (as measured by the stress and strains my heart experiences) is proportional to the square of the distance between us, instead of being inversely proportional to it!

This is a phenomenon which deeply surprises me.

To summarize,

Newton’s Law of gravitation,

$mathematical love letter$ Photo: Wikipedia

Force experienced by my heart = f X your beauty X your intelligence X r²

r = Distance between you and me

As you’d notice, the proportionality here is not determined by a constant K (as told by Newton) but miraculously, by a chaotic function f, the nature of which I’m yet to determine. I’m calling it “you”.

As a natural result of this force, my heart’s gravitational acceleration should have been –

My heart’s acceleration =( f X your beauty X your intelligence X r²)/mass of my heart

You’d be surprised to know that ever since this force started working on my heart, the mass of my heart has started tending to zero! (The Brownian motions experienced by it leads me to this postulate, as only particles whose mass can be compared to the fluidic medium they’re in – which I assume is gaseous in the case of my heart – can experience it).

As I’m sure you’ve concluded, the acceleration would be tending to infinity!

However, the repelling magnetic field of your silence is applying an opposite force on my heart, thereby creating severe stress.

Believe me, my poor heart is made of brittle material, which is “characterized by the fact that rupture occurs without any noticeable prior change in the rate of elongation”*.

The only solution, as you can clearly see from the above equations, is to switch off your magnetic field by accepting my love, and to reduce the distance between you and me (r) to a fraction, such that my heart can gain some respite from the maddening force and can save itself from a sudden rupture.

Yours truly,

A Mathematical Brain Addled by Love

*Source: Wikipedia

“Love Rejection” – A Complete Guide for Dealing with Rejection in Love

It was Dec. 2001.

I had a mad crush on this tall, dark, handsome school cricket team captain (don’t laugh). Somehow I’d managed to (ahem ahem…) get the message across to him through my best friend and yes, earned my first “love rejection” (as Indians call it, which means rejection in your love life). That’s right – my fourteen year old heart and all the tossing and turning emotions in it had just been rejected by the hero of my dreams.

Photo by Chandelier Motion Pictures

Yes I was hurt (a bit) on having earned the first rejection in my love life.

Sounds familiar? I bet.

If you have a love life – if you’ve ever fallen in love, proposed a girl or asked someone out on a date – it’s likely that you have faced, and are going to face many moments of “love rejection” in your life.

Rejection in love hurts and it’s real

What is rejection in love?

“Love rejection” doesn’t only mean being turned down for a date (or relationship). It also includes the everyday feelings of hurt and disappointment we feel when our expectations in the relationship are not met by our partner. From being cold-shouldered while trying to impress your girlfriend, to major relationship issues like infidelity and break-ups also give rise to feelings of rejection in our brain.

From a psychological perspective, rejection (particularly social rejection) is experienced by your brain because of some sort of deliberate exclusion – from a group, activity, level of intimacy, information or communication.

Photo by PinkyTurtles

Does rejection in love hurt? Self-help books and experts might claim that it shouldn’t, offering up one or more of the following self-help myths as explanation:

Myth #1. It’s possible to “choose to be happy”, regardless of what’s happening around you, ’cause happiness lies inside us.

Myth #2. Seeking inclusion or approval by others is a sign of weakness and should be overcome by loving yourself.

Myth #3. In order to have happy and fulfilling relationships, you need to first train yourself to be happy alone.

Unfortunately, if published research in the field of psychology is anything to go by, none of this is tenable.

As per Prof. C. Nathan DeWall, PhD, of the University of Kentucky, in order to function normally, human beings need strong, healthy relationships as much as they need food and water.According to Prof. Eisenberger from UCLA, one of the most prominent figures in the field of psychological research on rejection, the responses rejection (including rejection in love) causes in the brain is the same as the reaction caused by physical pain.

How to handle “love rejection”

So are you destined to bear all the pain of your rejection in love without any analgesic?

Fortunately, you don’t have to. You can’t pretend that the pain of “love rejection” is not real, but when you feel rejected in love is something you can control. Here’s a proven 5-step strategy to do just that.

Step #1. Acknowledge our differences

Do you know that there can be roughly 7 billion different versions of any given situation in this world?

Shocked?

That’s simply because no two people in this world experience exactly the same reality in any given situation, and there are about 7 billion people in this world. So there, you have it!

Naturally, the way your girlfriend/partner/potential date/crush looks at life is different from the way you do. Therefore it’s not only possible, but in fact probable that their response to any situation will be rather different from what you expect (in other words, what you would’ve done if you were in their shoes). If you’re one of the this-is-how-they-should-behave-because-that’s-what-I-think-is-right people (like I was), then it’s time for a reality check. The first step to avoid feeling rejected in love when it is not due, is to acknowledge this simple fact that each person’s reality is different.

Photo by Just a Toddler

Step #2. Brainstorm possible outcomes

Why do people feel rejected in love? Because they expect to be accepted.

What is expectation? It’s a certain possible outcome of any situation which you have in your mind.

We, human beings have a tendency of visualizing only one possible outcome of any given situation. And when the reality doesn’t match it we feel let down, betrayed, rejected. The rule of thumb that I’ve taught myself to minimize unwarranted feelings of rejection in any situation is, instead of envisaging only one possible response (from anyone), I force myself to sit back and imagine at least two possible responses, one of them compulsorily not-so-positive.

Step #3. Support each possibility with reasons

I also mentally construct all the possible reasons why each outcome should occur.

Let me give you an example. Let’s say, you’ve proposed your classmate. Don’t expect that she’ll accept you (in which case feelings of “love rejection” will quickly set in if she doesn’t), but don’t expect a rejection either (in that case you’re bound to be reeking of under-confidence when you propose her and she’s bound to reject you anyway! ).

Tell yourself, “There are two possible end scenarios. First, she could be happily accept me as her boyfriend because I’m an intelligent, honest and caring person (enlist whatever reasons you can think of, but have at least 2-3 of them). Second, she might also not want to get into a relationship with me because at the moment she might not be ready for any romantic relationship at all, she could be already interested in someone else, or she might be looking for some specific traits in a potential boyfriend which may be different from the positive traits which I possess.”

Step #4. Be objective

I think you realize that this reasoning exercise serves two purposes. First, in any situation it forces you to objectively picture both the positive and negative scenarios, thereby preparing you sufficiently for any outcome other than your desired one. Secondly, it also makes you look at the possible negative outcome very objectively, which helps limit personalization of the negative outcome which we all tend to do. So for example in this case, you’ve identified three possible reasons which might lead to a rejection-two of which don’t involve you at all. However you’re also remaining realistic and true to yourself by including one possible reason which is related to you. Even then you’re maintaining your objectivity by emphasizing to yourself that it’s not about whether you’re “good enough” for her or not, it’s just that what she wants and what you have are not the same.

Step #5. Rejection in love is not about you

This brings me to the most crucial part of dealing with rejection successfully, which is about totally avoiding unwarranted feelings of rejection (there are plenty of real rejections around you already, don’t make it up). Often you (and I, and most other people) tend to look at a situation as a rejection when it is not. We humans have a painful tendency to take anything negative way too personally.

As the earlier example will show you, rejections in love often have little connection with whether you’re good enough for someone or not. It only means what you offer is not the same as what they need. Look at it as the lid of Box 1 not fitting Box 2, simply because the two are not made to fit each other, rather than for the not being “big enough”, or “small enough” for the box.

Next time you encounter feelings of rejection in love (and trust me, there’s always a next time, ’cause life’s like that) apply this 5-step strategy and you’ll find you’ll be way better off in dealing with “love rejection”. You might even be able to use to constructively to create a better you. :)

10 Unique Gift Ideas for Your Girlfriend’s Birthday

If you have a girlfriend, I’d guess there’s a particular period of the year which makes you feel gradually more nervous and jittery. And that’s the time leading up to her birthday. The scariest question which appears on the mind of most of you roughly a month ahead of your girlfriend’s birthday is what to gift your girlfriend on her birthday. So here are the top 10 unique ways to sweep your girlfriend off her feet with never-thought-of-before gifts on her birthday. And what’s more, with these, her happiness on receiving her birthday gift will have no connection with the strength of your wallet! ;)

Gift your girlfriend her friends & family on her birthday

Invite her best school buddy or her closest cousin to her home on her birthday – someone who she loves dearly (other than you) and someone whose sudden appearance would make her feel incredibly happy and surprised. If she lives away from her parents (i.e. in a different city) you can invite them also, ,which will be a real surprise for her I’m sure. Make sure you manage to keep the whole thing from your girlfriend until the arrival of the guest.

Photo by MantiCorp Photography
Gift your girlfriend a serenade on her birthday

Take her out to the restaurant (like everyone does). Make arrangements with the restaurant so that all the staff there wish her a happy birthday – from the doorman to the floor manager, and tell them to play some particular favourite songs of hers – of which no one but you know. (This one’s something everyone doesn’t do, but how we wish they would!)
Gift your girlfriend her favourite food on her birthday

This one’s a bit tricky. Find out – from her, or even her friends and family if need be – all her favourite dishes. Try to pick out the not-so-easily-available ones from these (chocolate cake is easily available, whereas “my mother’s chocolate cookies” are not – you get the idea) and then get all of those on her birthday (Get some of them couriered if need be – difficult but worth the effort considering the sunrise you’ll see on her face when you present her with all those little joys of her life). The effort and the thoughts you’ve put in would take her totally off her feet.
Gift your girlfriend memories on her birthday

Photo by meshling
Create a collage of pictures of each of her birthdays till now, starting from her first. You need to carefully work at this one and plan well ahead of her birthday, ’cause as you understand you’ll need to painstakingly procure these pictures from her friends and family.
Gift your girlfriend her childhood on her birthday

Talk to her parents and childhood friends to find out trivia and stories of her birthdays when she was very young. Make a “Scrapbook of Linda’s (put your girlfriend’s name) birthdays” with photos of her friends and family and their quotes, and present it to her.
Gift your girlfriend a surprise on her birthday

Make a “Happy Birthday Linda (or whatever is her name)” poster. Let your imagination and creative instincts (and of course, your romantic heart) run wild. Print out at least twenty of them. And paste them outside her home (or bribe a neighbour of hers to do it ;)). I’m sure you can imagine the shock of surprise and happiness that’ll light up her heart when she sees this first thing in the morning when she leaves for work/school!
Gift your girlfriend a midnight surprise on her birthday

I have written about the super-dramatic alarm proposal earlier. This one’s kinda similar to it. Get your hands on her cell phone & set a reminder for some unreal hour like 3 in the morning or something, saying “Look inside your bag!” Of course you need to catch hold of her bag beforehand and put your special gift (and letter or card) in it. She’ll be groggy but I’m hoping she’ll get the idea. :D
Gift your girlfriend a special announcement on her birthday

If you’re really daring – you can try and tell her boss (if she’s a professional) or a professor of hers (if she’s in school or college) to announce her birthday at her workplace/in her class and to convey your dedication. If you can’t be present when the announcement is going to be made, tell a colleague or classmate of hers to take a photo of her hot blush and dazzling beam. I promise, you’ll cherish that photo forever.
Gift your girlfriend all your feelings on her birthday

Write down all the different types of feelings you have for her.

Photo by jaime973

Confused?

Let me explain.

It’s not just love, but also affection, admiration, friendship, commitment…etc. that you have for her, right? Now write all of them down on separate pieces of paper. Your messages should read something like – “here’s my love”, “here’s my affection”, “here’s my care”, “here’s my commitment”, “here’s my admiration”, “here’s my dreams”…. Again, feel free to go wild with the messages. Now hide them among her things in different places so that she discovers them throughout the day. I’m sure you can imagine how totally blown she’d be to find your love strewn all over her world.
Gift your girlfriend a dedication on her birthday

Last but not the least – let me know! Use the dedications section of Love in India to write your birthday message to her. You can also separately send me a story around you and her, and I promise Love in India will wish her a happy birthday with a dedicated post!

So what are you waiting for? Go ahead and test the ones you like on her birthday. Don’t forget to let me know what happened through the comments section!

3 stupid mistakes to avoid if you want to impress your girlfriend

There’s this guy who bought a set of sexy lingerie for his girlfriend & a bicycle repair kit for his boss for Christmas and accidentally mixed them up in a moment of nervous excitement.

Trying to impress your girlfriend is commendable. However trying too hard might not always be in your best interest. Here are top 3 mistakes to avoid if you’re trying to impress your girlfriend.

Photo by christopher campbell design

Being a sweet little puppy

I know he’s the cutest thing she’s seen. I know your girlfriend would give her world for him. But would she want to choose him as her life partner – is the question you need to ask yourself before making him your role-model.

I’m talking about her white puddle. He obeys every word she says and conveys his blind allegiance through licking her fingers. I’ve already written about this – If you try to be like him thinking she’ll be all pleased with you for saying yes to everything and pretending to be a lady in waiting, you’re wrong. The one thing every girl despises is a guy with no spine. She’s judging you as potential husband material, not servant material! So avoid the dog-technique completely.

Getting too cozy too early

Photo by shaymaya

One more cardinal mistake is to try to get physical with her (in any form) at an early stage before she’s comfortable with it. This is a sure fire way of losing her trust. Unless you want to quickly get out of “the boyfriend zone” avoid this one.

“I’m the best!”

If you’re playing “who can bore her and irritate her in the shortest possible time” then go ahead with bragging in full force like many men do. Nothing puts a girl off more than an endless advertisement of yourself. Men who do that forget the simple fact that she knows what he is, and she likes him for what he is. Whatever he needs to keep announcing beyond that, is something she’ll not take seriously at best, and get disgusted with at worst.

What are some of the stupidest things you did to impress your girlfriend? Tell me by leaving a comment.

How to propose a girl who’s your classmate: Top 5 ways

In some earlier posts I had some great fun discussing many quirky aspects of how to propose a girl – here, here & here. Many of you have been requesting more articles on similar topics, so I thought we’ll look more closely at how to propose your classmate, since after all, this is the most common scenario for Indians trying to propose a girl. Let’s get started with the top 5 ways ranging from sweet to whacky…

#1. The good old letter between the pages

This is the classic vintage way of proposing a girl who’s your classmate in school/college/university (and super romantic too). Get hold of one of her books/copies and insert your heart in! ;) Did I say heart? I meant heart melted into a few (or five thousand if you can’t control it :P) words on a sheet of scented paper. A quaint little love letter often finds it easier to charm its way into a girl’s heart. You can find tips on how to write a love letter here.

How to propose a girl who's your classmate - love letter

Photo by Angelica Miller

#2. The good old go-to friend

If you’re one of the shy types, get a friend who’s a good-storyteller to do it for you. It’s best if you can convince a friend of hers to do it, ‘cause he/she would already have her trust and hence you’ll have more chances of success. ;)

#3. For those of you who think they’re Shah Rukh Khan…

…In the 90’s – you can declare it to the whole world, the earth, the Nature, God (…also your professors ;) ) by doing it on the stage. Wait for a college/university event, manage to bag some coordinating responsibility, and when you catch hold of the mic – tell her that you love her. A word of caution: How ever daring or confident you might feel, don’t propose on the stage in a gathering of more than 50-60 people (you’ll regret it).

How to propose a girl who's your classmate - Rock Star

Photo by von_brandis

#4. Get her hooked with some mystery

Put a very serious looking notice on the noticeboard saying something like, “the following five students have been called at such an such hour to such an such office.” Include her name, of course. Inform the other four students of your plan beforehand. Her heart will be racing with apprehensions about getting some sort of bad news from the school/college authorities … and you’ll be present at the designated place & time to give her the best news of her life (according to you ;)).

#5. Public yet private proposal

Reach your next classroom before anyone else. Write one of those cheeky “John + Jane = bliss” messages on the blackboard, big enough for everyone to see. Don’t be afraid to get creative/humorous (but avoid being suggestive or risqué, it’s a classroom!). When everyone sees it and starts laughing vehemently claim it was done by someone else to tease you. Later message her saying you did it yourself. This is great way to propose a girl if you want to start it off with good humour!

#6. Is there a #6?

Have you ever had a crush on a classmate?
Did you propose a girl who’s your classmate?
Are you currently in a relationship with/married to your erstwhile classmate?
I’m eager to know your story of how you proposed to a girl who’s your classmate. Please share it by leaving a comment.

Help! I’m in love with my best friend! (Part 2)

In my last post I talked about the three key questions to consider if you start feeling like you’re in love with your best friend. So if you’re sure about your feelings, have asked yourself these questions and have also mustered up the courage to propose to your girl, here are the top three mistakes to avoid before you blurt it out.

#1. Flirt, but don’t overdo it

Photo by motoed

Don’t be afraid to get a bit flirty in your daily conversations with you best friend. However, knowing where to draw the line is key. “You’re looking ravishing today!” is ok, whereas “You’re looking hot! I wish I could lay you.” is crude and will cause you to lose her trust fast.
Text her just a tad more often than earlier. “Missing you…” / “waiting to see you in college tomorrow…”/ “Can’t wait to see you this weekend…” is cool.
Above all – whenever you meet her let your eyes speak. ;)

#2. Don’t be her dog

The worst (and most common) mistake guys make after their eureka moment of “I’m in love with my best friend” is to become her dog. You know what I mean. He’ll become an overly supportive wherever-you-go-I-follow obsequious servant of hers. Believe me guys, that’s the best and fastest way to lose a girl’s respect.

Photo by ☆Mi☺Λmor☆

You’re thinking “She’ll realize I’m so caring.”
She’s thinking, “Jeez! This guy has no personality of his own!”
Show her that you care for her. But all with a healthy dose of manly confidence & personality.

#3. Avoid possessiveness like plague

Another very common mistake while hinting at the fact that you’re in love with your best friend is to become possessive of her.

Where is she going?

Who is she spending her time with?

She didn’t turn up at school/college/work today…could she be spending the day with some guy???

STOP those thoughts the moment they occur. You’re in love with your best friend (or anybody) doesn’t mean you own them. Be grateful for having a special place in her life already. Stop the urges to know more and control more of her life than she willingly invites you to do.
Don’t ask the obvious questions. Wait for her to answer you before you ask. Let’s say she didn’t turn up at school/college/work one day. When she turns up the next day, causally ask, “How’re you? Everything alright?” Don’t add, “Why didn’t you turn up yesterday?”. This will show her that you care for her and yet respect her privacy. That goes a long way in gaining the trust of most girls. If you can do that, it’ll draw her closer. Most likely she’ll spontaneously explain the reason of her absence to you sometime.

Any other cardinal step to take before you propose to your best friend who you’re in love with? Please share through the comments section.

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